Exploring Wounds Through Attachment Style

Course Cut-OutFreedom From Pornogrpahy
Written By Austin Cavaliere

If you need help seeing Jesus in the middle of your struggle, or just feel like you are stuck, ready to move into growth and healing, connect with a Christian coach.

Excerpt: Exploring Wounds through Attachment Style

Course: Freedom From Pornography

Speakers: Matthias Barker

Healing the Hidden Wounds: Attachment, God, and Overcoming Pornography

Let's be honest. We all carry wounds. Deep, unseen scars that shape our behaviors and relationships. What wounds are shaping your life? What echoes of pain linger from your childhood, from your relationships with your parents?

Parental Wounds and Attachment's Impact on Your Life

Think back. Were there times you felt safe, secure, able to run to them for comfort? Or were there areas, topics, where you felt utterly alone, unsafe, like you had to perform to earn their love? These early experiences shape our attachment styles, influencing how we connect with others and even with God.

Church and Community Wounds: When Faith Feels Unsafe

Consider your church experience. Were there spaces where you felt seen, accepted, cared for? Or did you feel you had to perform to be accepted? Did you feel like you could confide in your pastor or youth pastor? Wounds within our faith communities can deeply impact our spiritual journey

Relationship with God and Spiritual Attachment: Is There Anxious Attachment?

And what about your relationship with God? Are there areas where you feel you must perform, be "better," to earn His favor? Do you experience anxious attachment with God? Do you feel alone in your journey, striving to make yourself "good enough" to connect with Him? This pattern can be a significant obstacle to healing.

Pornography as a Symptom of Deeper Wounds: Isolation and Performance

Because here's the truth: pornography often becomes a battleground. We try to perform, to be "good enough," then we fail, and we feel utterly isolated—not just from people, but from God Himself. This cycle can fuel an anxious or avoidant attachment with God, hindering our ability to find true healing.

The Path to Healing: Realigning Your Perspective on God's Love

If our identity in Christ is to truly heal these deep wounds, we must examine our attachment to God. We must realign our perspective, our focus, on how we've been orienting ourselves toward Him, and how He orients Himself toward us. This is crucial for overcoming pornography and finding lasting freedom.

Healing is Worth the Reflection

This is worth some serious reflection. This is where true healing begins. Understanding our attachment patterns, our wounds, and our relationship with God is the first step toward lasting change.

 

If you like the content, you can continue in a few different ways…

  • 1) See the outline below and check out other sections from the FFP course.

  • 2) Take the full small group course to your church community! The first course your church runs is free! Reach out to us here to learn how.

  • 3) Connect with a Share The Struggle Coach for one-on-one support. Let’s face it, some of us have tried kicking this thing, and we’ve had no luck. It’s time to start looking toward forms of support that can help us see and feel the beautiful life God has in store for us.

 

Freedom From Pornography

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Freedom From Pornography 〰️

Part 1: Stories of Struggle

Session 1: What is the Struggle?

Session 2: The People

Part 2: The Roots of Dependency versus Design

Session 3: How Does This Dependency Begin?

Session 4: Biblical Roots

Part 3: Reconnecting and Reattaching

Session 5: Reconnecting With An Authentic God

Session 6: Working On Self

Session 7: Working With Others

Session 8: Healing With A Spouse

 

Share The Struggle Courses

Share the Struggle Courses are topical expert led video courses to help you understand life’s greatest struggles and provide you with tools for navigating them. Moreover, STS courses create a space for you to connect with others struggling with similar things, experience belonging, and encounter God’s nearness in a place of wilderness in your life (pain, confusion, healing journey). Want to start a group at your church? Reach out to us here to learn how.

 

What Share The Struggle Believes

Here at Share The Struggle we believe Jesus is present with us in the middle of our pain and mess, and it is in that place that we often experience and encounter Jesus most deeply.

We understand the unique challenges faced by Christians dealing with mental health. Our mission is to bridge the gap between faith and mental health support, providing a platform where individuals can find resources, coaching support and guidance, all tailored to their spiritual life and emotional needs.

We invite you to explore our resources, share your journey, and find the support you need to overcome the struggles you face.

Austin Cavaliere
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