Seeing Behind the (Pornography) Addiction
If you need help seeing Jesus in the middle of your struggle, or just feel like you are stuck, ready to move into growth and healing, connect with a Christian coach.
Excerpt: Helping Helpers - Session 3
Section: Pornography - Seeing Behind the Addiction
Speakers: Matthias Barker
Supporting Someone Through Severe Trauma and Risky Behaviors
When walking alongside someone who has experienced severe trauma and is exhibiting risky behaviors, it's common to feel overwhelmed. These situations may include self-harm, suicidal ideation, violence, problematic parenting, or addiction. Here's how to approach these situations while maintaining boundaries and ensuring safety:
1. Encouraging Professional Help
Suggest Therapy: Encourage them to seek professional therapy. Explain the benefits and offer to help them find a therapist.
Respect Their Decision: If they are resistant, continue to be a supportive and stable presence without pressuring them.
2. Recognize Your Limits
Boundaries: Understand that your role is to support, not to fix. You are not a therapist or savior.
Emotional Self-Care: Take care of your own mental health. Supporting someone through trauma can be emotionally taxing.
3. Identify and Address Safety Concerns
Serious Concerns: If there are indications of immediate risk to themselves or others, such as suicidal ideation, self-harm, or violence, it's crucial to take action.
Consult Professionals: When in doubt, consult with professionals, such as your pastor, a therapist, or a relevant hotline.
4. Practical Steps for Safety
Hotlines for Consultation: Use hotlines for guidance on handling specific situations. These resources are not only for emergencies but also for advice.
Suicide Prevention Hotline: Call to discuss concerns about someone expressing suicidal thoughts.
Child Abuse Hotline: Consult if you suspect child abuse or harmful parenting practices.
Domestic Violence Hotline: Seek advice if there are signs of domestic violence.
5. Examples of Hotlines and Resources
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (US): 1-800-273-8255
Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (US): 1-800-422-4453
National Domestic Violence Hotline (US): 1-800-799-7233
6. Engaging in Conversations
Gentle Encouragement: Continue to gently encourage professional help without being forceful or manipulative.
Safe Environment: Create a safe, non-judgmental space where they feel heard and supported.
Active Listening: Reflect back what they say, showing empathy and understanding.
7. Emergency Situations
Immediate Danger: If there is an immediate risk of harm, don't hesitate to call emergency services.
Reporting: If necessary, report to appropriate authorities, such as child protective services, when a child's safety is at risk.
8. Building a Support Network
Community Support: Encourage them to connect with support groups or community resources.
Spiritual Support: If appropriate, offer spiritual support and prayer, respecting their comfort level.
9. Personal Reflection and Prayer
Pray for Guidance: Spend time in prayer for wisdom and guidance in how best to support them.
Depend on God: Remember that ultimately, healing comes from God, and your role is to point them towards His love and care.
Conclusion
Supporting someone through severe trauma and risky behaviors is a delicate and significant task. It requires empathy, patience, and wisdom. By recognizing your limits, encouraging professional help, and utilizing available resources, you can provide meaningful support without overstepping your role. Always prioritize safety and seek professional guidance when necessary, ensuring that you are a stable and compassionate presence in their journey towards healing.
The Share the Struggle Helping Helpers Course is designed for helpers & leaders both formally (pastors, small group leaders) and informally (family, friends, volunteers), giving a practical and safe framework for coming alongside someone well in the middle of their struggle(s). The Share the Struggle L.E.S.S. (Listen, Explore, Share, Support) framework equips helpers with the tools for active listening, root cause exploration, 3-story discipleship, and when to involve other forms of support. Furthermore, helping helpers walks listeners through the specific considerations and tools for helping someone through anxiety, shame, trauma, miscarriage, pornography addiction, grief, eating disorders, and suicide prevention.
Share The Struggle Courses
Share the Struggle Courses are topical expert led video courses to help you understand life’s greatest struggles and provide you with tools for navigating them. Moreover, STS courses create a space for you to connect with others struggling with similar things, experience belonging, and encounter God’s nearness in a place of wilderness in your life (pain, confusion, healing journey).
What Share The Struggle Believes
Here at Share The Struggle we believe Jesus is present with us in the middle of our pain and mess, and it is in that place that we often experience and encounter Jesus most deeply.
We understand the unique challenges faced by Christians dealing with mental health. Our mission is to bridge the gap between faith and mental health support, providing a platform where individuals can find resources, coaching support and guidance, all tailored to their spiritual life and emotional needs.
We invite you to explore our resources, share your journey, and find the support you need to overcome the struggles you face.
