How to Build a Relationship With God and Maintain It
What does a relationship with God look like and how do I maintain it?
What Jesus Christ says:
One profound example of a personal and close relationship with God is illustrated through the entire life of Jesus Christ. Throughout the New Testament, the depth of Jesus' connection with God the Father is evident, showcasing key aspects of faith, obedience, and love. Jesus often described His relationship with God as one of unity and intimacy. In John 10:30, Jesus declares, "I and the Father are one," highlighting the unique oneness He shares with God. This intertwined connection is further evidenced in John 14:10-11 where Jesus states, "Don’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you I do not speak on my own authority. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me."
The relationship is underscored by obedience, as seen in John 6:38 where Jesus professes, "For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of Him who sent me." This devotion to God's will reflects Jesus' commitment to living a life in accordance with divine purpose and commands. The strength of this relationship also brings forth the promise of eternal life, with Jesus emphasizing in John 17:3, "Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent." Through His life, teachings, and sacrifices, Jesus Christ encapsulated the essence of a deep personal relationship with God, setting an example for believers to follow in their spiritual journey toward eternal life. Jesus answered yes to the will of the Father, we need to as well.
What King David says:
David, the shepherd who became a king, is another prominent character in the Bible who had a profound relationship with God. This bond is vividly portrayed throughout the Psalms, where David's prayers and songs reflect a heart deeply connected with his Heavenly Father. David is often called "a man after God's own heart" (1 Samuel 13:14), illustrating his earnest desire to align his life with God's will. In Psalm 23:1, David declares, "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want." This metaphor underscores his dependence on God's guidance and provision, portraying God as a caring shepherd who leads and protects His flock.
David’s life was marked by faith and unwavering devotion to God’s Word. When facing the giant Goliath, David’s confidence was rooted in God's promises, as he proclaimed, "You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty" (1 Samuel 17:45). His reliance on God’s strength demonstrates his belief in the power and authority of his Heavenly Father.
David's relationship with God extended to his deep repentance and seeking mercy after his transgressions, as illustrated in Psalm 51:10, where he pleads, "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." This heartfelt plea reveals David’s recognition of his need for God's forgiveness and the transformative power of God’s Word.
What Paul says:
Paul, formerly known as Saul, is a prime example of transformation and devotion, illustrating a powerful relationship with God through the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Once a fervent persecutor of Christians, Paul experienced a radical conversion on the road to Damascus, as described in Acts 9:4-5: "He fell to the ground and heard God’s voice say to him, 'Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?' 'Who are you, Lord?' Saul asked. 'I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,' he replied." This dramatic encounter began Paul's journey into a deep and committed relationship with God.
Central to Paul's relationship with God was his profound understanding and appreciation of God's love. In Romans 8:38-39, Paul passionately articulates, "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." This conviction emphasizes his belief in the unbreakable bond of God's love, a cornerstone of his faith.
Paul’s life and ministry were marked by his reliance on the Holy Spirit. He frequently sought the Spirit's guidance and strength in his missionary work. In Galatians 5:16, Paul advises, "So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh." His exhortations to live by the Spirit highlight the integral role the Holy Spirit played in nurturing his own personal relationship with God.
Paul's letters are replete with expressions of his devotion and the significance of a personal relationship with Christ. In Philippians 1:21, he declares, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." This statement becomes a testament to his total dedication and unwavering faith in Jesus. Paul's life, marked by dedication, enduring hardships, and unwavering faith, sets a compelling example for believers striving to cultivate their own personal relationship with God through the love of Christ and the empowerment of the Holy Spirit.
Steps to Take to Start Building a Relationship with Jesus
1. Seek Jesus Through Prayer
Prayer is a vital pathway to seeking Jesus and developing a deep relationship with Him. God created prayer and spending time in prayer allows believers to communicate with God, express their gratitude, seek guidance, grow in faith, and develop a close relationship with Him. As stated in Jeremiah 29:12-13, "Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." This scripture highlights the importance of earnest prayer in knowing God more intimately. Jesus Himself often retreated to spend time to pray, setting an example for us to follow (Luke 5:16). Through prayer, we align our hearts with God's will, find comfort in His presence, and build a foundation for a strong spiritual connection with Jesus.
One of Jesus' profound teachings on prayer is told in Matthew 6:6, where He advises, "But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." This instruction emphasizes the importance of our quiet time with Christ to cultivate a deeper and strong personal relationship with God. By retreating to a quiet place, free from distractions and worldly noise, believers can focus entirely on their communication with the Father.
2. Read and Study the Bible
Reading and studying God's Word is essential because it is through Scripture that God speaks to us, guiding and enlightening our paths as it has all the answers. As Hebrews 4:12 reveals, "For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." This passage underscores the transformative power of God's Word, which acts as a tool for spiritual growth and discernment. Through the Bible, we learn to understand God’s voice, trust Him, and find assurance in His promises and truths. Proverbs 3:5-6 advises, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." Engaging with Scripture fosters a deeper relationship with God, enabling us to navigate life's challenges with faith and conviction.
3. Attend Church Services and Fellowship
Fellowship and attending church services are vital components when building a relationship with Jesus, as they provide a supportive community of believers to grow and strengthen one's faith. Gathering in worship allows individuals to experience God’s presence collectively and be encouraged by the teaching of His Word. Hebrews 10:24-25 emphasizes the importance of fellowship, stating, "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching." In church, believers find spiritual nourishment and accountability, helping them to remain steadfast in their faith journey. Additionally, being part of a faith community aligns with the essence of how to build a relationship with God, as it encourages a sense of belonging and shared purpose.
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4. Confess and Repent
Confession and repentance are crucial steps in building a relationship with Jesus, as they align believers with God's will and open the pathway to His mercy and grace. According to scripture, God reveals the importance of acknowledging our sins and turning away from them to walk in righteousness. In 1 John 1:9, it is stated, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." This passage highlights God's readiness to forgive and purify those who come before Him with a repentant heart.
Repentance is not just about asking for forgiveness but also making a conscious decision to forsake sinful behaviors and live a life of spiritual worship. Jesus underscores this transformative process in Luke 5:32, where He says, "I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance." This call to repentance is an invitation to experience a renewed and closer relationship with Christ Jesus, grounded in the truth and dedication of a worshipful life.
Repentance demonstrates a believer's genuine commitment to spiritual worship, reflecting a heart that seeks to honor God in all aspects. Romans 12:1 provides a profound insight into this, stating, "Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship." By confessing and repenting, we submit ourselves as living sacrifices, embodying the essence of spiritual worship that is pleasing to God. These acts of humility and dedication are essential in developing and maintaining a deep, transformative relationship with Jesus.
5. Cultivate a Heart of Obedience
Cultivating a heart of obedience is crucial in building an intimate relationship with Jesus and experiencing God's blessings. Obedience to God's commands demonstrates our love and commitment to Him. In John 14:23, Jesus emphasizes the importance of obedience, saying, "Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them." This scripture indicates that through obedience, believers invite God's presence into their lives.
Jesus reinforces the significance of doing God's will in Matthew 7:21, where He states, "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven." This highlights that true discipleship involves not only verbal affirmations but also the practical application of God’s teachings.
Obedience unlocks God's blessings and aligns us with His divine purpose. In Luke 11:28, Jesus said, "Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it." This underscores that living in obedience to God’s Word is integral to receiving His favor and blessings. Through obedience, believers demonstrate their trust in God’s wisdom and provision, paving the way for a more profound and intimate relationship with Him.
6. Serve Others
Serving others is a fundamental aspect of building a relationship with Jesus, as it follows His teaching and example of love, humility, and compassion. Jesus himself exemplified servanthood throughout His life, embodied by His words in Mark 10:45, "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
This demonstrates that serving others is not merely an act of kindness, but a powerful expression of one's faith and commitment to following Jesus. By serving others, believers mirror Christ's selflessness and care for humanity, fostering a closer relationship with Him. In Matthew 25:40, Jesus emphasizes the impact of serving others, saying, "Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me." Serving others aligns one's actions with the heart and mission of Jesus, embodying His teachings in daily life and nurturing a spirit of love and empathy within the Christian community.
7. Seek the Holy Spirit
Seeking the Holy Spirit is essential for believers as it provides divine guidance, empowerment, and intimacy with God. Jesus promised the Holy Spirit to His followers as a Helper who would teach them all things and remind them of His words. In John 14:26, it is written, "But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you." This highlights the role of the Holy Spirit in illuminating the truths of God's Word and leading believers in their spiritual journey. Acts 1:8 emphasizes the empowering presence of the Holy Spirit, stating, "But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." By seeking the Holy Spirit, believers are equipped with the strength and wisdom to live out their faith boldly and fruitfully, while nurturing a deeper, more vibrant relationship with God.
What a Relationship With God Is Not
A relationship with God is characterized by love, trust, and obedience. God created us to be in relationship with Him. However, the Bible provides numerous examples of attitudes and behaviors that demonstrate what a relationship with God should not look like. These examples serve as warnings and lessons for believers striving to walk in faith.
1. Disobedience and Rebellion
One clear attribute of a flawed relationship with God is disobedience. An example of this can be seen in the story of King Saul. In 1 Samuel 15:22-23, Saul disobeyed God's command to completely destroy the Amalekites and their livestock. Instead, he spared the best of the sheep and cattle. Samuel rebuked Saul, saying, "To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry." Saul's disobedience led to his rejection as king, showing that God values obedience over ritualistic offerings. This event serves as a powerful reminder that true faith is demonstrated through actions and adherence to divine commandments rather than through superficial rituals.
2. Pride and Arrogance
Pride creates a significant barrier between humanity and God by nurturing a sense of self-sufficiency and arrogance that can distance individuals from recognizing their need for divine guidance and grace. This concept is vividly illustrated in the biblical story of King Nebuchadnezzar in Daniel 4.
King Nebuchadnezzar, ruler of Babylon, is depicted as a powerful monarch who becomes exceedingly proud of his achievements. His arrogance reaches a peak when he boasts about his accomplishments, attributing his success solely to his own efforts without acknowledging God's sovereignty. This prideful attitude leads to a dramatic fall orchestrated by God to teach Nebuchadnezzar a vital lesson.
God humbles Nebuchadnezzar by stripping him of his sanity and authority. The king is reduced to living like an animal, wandering away from human society and eating grass like an ox. This period of humiliation lasts until Nebuchadnezzar comes to a profound realization about the divine power and justice of God.
In Daniel 4:37, Nebuchadnezzar's transformation is complete as he declares, "Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and exalt and glorify the King of heaven, because everything he does is right and all his ways are just. And those who walk in pride he is able to humble." This confession marks a significant shift from arrogance to humility, showcasing the king's newfound recognition of God's rightful place in his life and the universe.
This passage illustrates a critical spiritual principle: pride disrupts a proper relationship with God by promoting a false sense of independence and self-importance. When individuals exalt themselves, they fail to see the need for God's guidance, mercy, and provision. Conversely, humility opens the door to a restored relationship with God, characterized by a recognition of His sovereignty, righteousness, and justice.
3. Lack of Trust and Faith
A lack of trust in God undermines a genuine relationship with Him. This concept is vividly illustrated through the Israelites' journey in the wilderness. Time and again, they exhibited a lack of faith in God's guidance and promises. A notable example is found in Numbers 14. When the Israelites were on the brink of entering the Promised Land—a land God had assured them—they were paralyzed by fear and doubt. Instead of trusting in God's promise, they were so overcome with anxiety that they suggested, "We should choose a leader and go back to Egypt" (Numbers 14:4). This statement highlights their intense fear and lack of trust, as they preferred returning to a life of slavery over stepping into the unknown with God's assurance. Their decision to reject God's promise had severe consequences; it led to 40 years of wandering in the desert. This period of aimless travel served as a stark reminder of the repercussions of faithlessness and the importance of trusting in God's plan.
4. Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy is condemned by God and damages a true relationship with Him. In Matthew 23:27, Jesus rebukes the Pharisees, saying, "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean." This strong condemnation highlights that genuine faith requires integrity and congruence between one's actions and beliefs.
In other words, it's not enough to merely appear righteous or holy outwardly while harboring sinful, impure, or dishonest intentions within. True faith and a meaningful relationship with God demand that our external behaviors align with our internal convictions. Jesus criticized the Pharisees because they focused on maintaining a facade of piety and righteousness, but their hearts were not aligned with the true values and principles they professed to uphold. This passage underscores the importance of sincerity, authenticity, and living out one's faith consistently in both thought and deed.
5. Idolatry
Idolatry is another attribute that represents a broken relationship with God. It involves placing anything or anyone in a position of ultimate importance above God, which disrupts the covenant relationship between humans and the divine. The Israelites repeatedly turned to idols, despite witnessing God's mighty works and covenant promises. This behavior highlights a recurring theme in their history: the temptation to seek tangible, controllable deities rather than trusting in an all-powerful God.
In Exodus 32, while Moses was on Mount Sinai receiving the Ten Commandments, the Israelites grew impatient and created a golden calf to worship. They declared, "These are your gods, Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt" (Exodus 32:4). This statement not only credited a lifeless object with the miraculous deliverance from Egypt but also signified a profound betrayal of their unique relationship with God.
This act of idolatry provoked God's wrath, illustrating the seriousness of placing anything above Him. It shows that idolatry isn't just about worshiping statues or images; it's about allowing anything—whether it be power, wealth, relationships, or even our own desires—to take precedence over our devotion to God. This disruption of the covenant relationship underscores the importance of fidelity to God and the dangers of letting other "idols" take His place in our lives.
6. Unforgiveness
Holding onto unforgiveness can severely harm a person's relationship with God. According to Christian teachings, forgiveness is a cornerstone of faith, reflecting God's own willingness to forgive human sins. By harboring resentment and refusing to forgive others, individuals create a barrier between themselves and God, preventing them from fully experiencing His grace and mercy.
Jesus emphasized the significance of forgiveness through the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant, found in Matthew 18:21-35. In this story, a servant who owed an enormous debt was forgiven by his master. However, after receiving this mercy, the servant refused to forgive a fellow servant who owed him a much smaller sum. The master, upon discovering this, reprimanded the servant and revoked his forgiveness, illustrating the expectation that those who receive mercy should also extend it to others.
This parable highlights the principle that an unwillingness to forgive others can block God's forgiveness in one's life, ultimately damaging the relationship with Him. Forgiveness is not just a divine command but a practice that reflects one's understanding and acceptance of God's mercy. By forgiving others, believers align themselves with God's teachings and open their hearts to His continued guidance and grace.
Frequently Asked How to Build a Relationship with God Questions
How to Develop Love for God?
Developing love for God is a recurring theme throughout the Bible, and several individuals exemplified this through their actions and faithfulness. One prominent example is King David, who showed his immense love for God through his psalms and unwavering faith. Despite facing numerous trials, including being pursued by King Saul, David continually sought God's guidance and expressed his devotion through heartfelt prayers and worship. His psalms frequently reflect a deep yearning for God's presence and blessings, often concluding with the desire that "God bless" his endeavors and provide divine protection.
Being in the presence of the Lord significantly enhances love for Him, drawing believers closer and deepening their devotion. Psalms 16:11 beautifully captures this sentiment: "You make known to me the path of life; in your presence, there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore." This scripture reveals that experiencing God's presence brings profound joy and satisfaction, creating a stronger bond of love.
What Blocks Intimacy With God?
Several evil ways can block intimacy with God, such as pride, greed, and sexual immorality. Pride leads individuals to rely on their own understanding rather than submitting to God's wisdom, creating a barrier to a humble and teachable spirit. Greed demonstrates a focus on material wealth and possessions, diverting attention from spiritual growth and dependence on God’s providence. Sexual immorality, encompassing behaviors like adultery and promiscuity, directly violates God's commandments and distorts the sanctity of relationships designed by Him. These sinful actions not only separate a person from God's holiness but also hinder the ability to experience His love, grace, and guidance fully.
How to Grow Closer to God as a Couple?
One of the fundamental ways for couples to grow closer to God is through shared spiritual practices and seeking His guidance together. Regularly reading and discussing the Bible allows couples to delve into God's word, understand His teachings, and apply them in their relationship. Scriptures such as Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 emphasize the strength and support found in unity, stating, "Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." Incorporating daily devotionals and praying together enables a strong spiritual bond and keeps God at the center of their relationship. Praying together helps couples express gratitude, seek wisdom, and intercede for each other, promoting a deep sense of unity and mutual support under God's care.
Engaging in service and worship as a couple is another profound way to draw closer to God. Participating in church activities, volunteering in community service, or embarking on mission trips allows couples to live out their faith practically and grow spiritually together. Serving others aligns with Jesus' teaching in Matthew 25:40, which says, "Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me." Worshiping together, whether through singing hymns, attending church services, or spending quiet moments in nature reflecting on God's creation, invites God's presence into the relationship. These shared spiritual experiences not only enhance individual faith but also build a resilient, God-centered partnership, guiding the couple through life's challenges with divine strength and compassion.
Conclusion
Building a relationship with God requires earnest effort and sincere devotion, evident through the practices of forgiveness, humility, and shared spiritual activities, particularly within the context of intimate relationships. Biblical teachings emphasize the importance of extending mercy, seeking God's presence, and engaging in communal worship and service. By embodying these principles and staying vigilant against pride, greed, and immorality, individuals and couples can forge a closer bond with God, experiencing His boundless love, grace, and guidance that only God can provide. Through continuous spiritual growth and mutual support, believers can thrive in their faith journey, reflecting God's teachings in their daily lives and relationships.